Housebroken

Housebroken
Title Housebroken PDF eBook
Author Laurie Notaro
Publisher Ballantine Books
Total Pages 288
Release 2016-07-12
Genre Humor
ISBN 1101886099

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“If Laurie Notaro’s books don’t inspire pants-wetting fits of laughter, then please consult your physician, because, clearly, your funny bone is broken.”—Jen Lancaster, author of I Regret Nothing #1 New York Times bestselling author Laurie Notaro isn’t exactly a domestic goddess—unless that means she fully embraces her genetic hoarding predisposition, sneaks peeks at her husband’s daily journal, or has made a list of the people she wants on her Apocalypse Survival team (her husband’s not on it). Notaro chronicles her chronic misfortune in the domestic arts, including cooking, cleaning, and putting on Spanx while sweaty (which should technically qualify as an Olympic sport). Housebroken is a rollicking new collection of essays showcasing her irreverent wit and inability to feel shame. From defying nature in the quest to make her own Twinkies, to begging her new neighbors not to become urban livestock keepers, to teaching her eight-year-old nephew about hoboes, Notaro recounts her best efforts—and hilarious failures—in keeping a household inches away from being condemned. After all, home wasn’t built in a day. Praise for Laurie Notaro “Notaro is a scream, the freak-magnet of a girlfriend you can’t wait to meet for a drink to hear her latest story.”—The Plain Dealer “Hilarious, fabulously improper, and completely relatable, Notaro is the queen of funny.”—Celia Rivenbark, author of Rude Bitches Make Me Tired “Notaro is direct and self-deprecating, and her disastrous attempts to sew a dress and make jerky treats for her dog are relatable and funny.”—Library Journal

Housebroken

Housebroken
Title Housebroken PDF eBook
Author Yael Hedaya
Publisher Macmillan
Total Pages 330
Release 2002-07-05
Genre Fiction
ISBN 9780312420901

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In a striking debut, three piercing, powerful novellas that unveil the hazards of love and desire.

Housebroken

Housebroken
Title Housebroken PDF eBook
Author Steve Watkins
Publisher Andrews McMeel Publishing
Total Pages 132
Release 2004
Genre Comics & Graphic Novels
ISBN 9780740746734

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Comic strip about an African American family and their dog.

Housebroken

Housebroken
Title Housebroken PDF eBook
Author David Eddie
Publisher Vintage Canada
Total Pages 227
Release 2010-11-05
Genre Family & Relationships
ISBN 0307369048

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Housebroken charts the evolution of one man from unregenerate cad to stay-at-home dad. And along the way David Eddie provides lots of useful tips for other men who have ended up treading the domestic path: basic but puzzling things like how to cook, how to stay faithful to your wife and how to bend your gender without losing your machismo. Above all, Housebroken is a story of the great adventures it is possible to have within a three-block radius of your house, from one of the frankest, freshest and wittiest voices to come along in years.

Housebroken

Housebroken
Title Housebroken PDF eBook
Author Yael Hedaya
Publisher Metropolitan Books
Total Pages 288
Release 2013-10-22
Genre Fiction
ISBN 1466855207

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In a striking debut, three piercing, powerful novellas that unveil the hazards of love and desire. The men, women, and even animals in this enthralling collection live at the mercy of their hearts. Young and old, on two legs or four, they grope for love and tenderness, knowing that all connection is fraught with danger and all relationship random and evanescent. Yet the heart wants what it wants. The title novella, a wrenching account of the end of love, traces a gentle dog's transformation into a vicious beast as the couple who owns him breaks apart. In "The Happiness Game," the tenuous bonds between husband and wife are undermined by black crows and weak hearts, while "Matti" presents a chorus of voices -- doctors, nurses, jilted wife, dying husband -- that recounts an old man's passion for his lover, a fifteen-year-old Lolita. Wise and deft, tart yet tender, written in supple, beautifully inflected prose, Yael Hedaya's Housebroken navigates the moments of decision, betrayal, longing, and jealousy that torment the souls of wounded lovers.

Housebroken

Housebroken
Title Housebroken PDF eBook
Author Laurie Notaro
Publisher National Geographic Books
Total Pages 0
Release 2016-07-12
Genre Humor
ISBN 1101886080

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“If Laurie Notaro’s books don’t inspire pants-wetting fits of laughter, then please consult your physician, because, clearly, your funny bone is broken.”—Jen Lancaster, author of I Regret Nothing #1 New York Times bestselling author Laurie Notaro isn’t exactly a domestic goddess—unless that means she fully embraces her genetic hoarding predisposition, sneaks peeks at her husband’s daily journal, or has made a list of the people she wants on her Apocalypse Survival team (her husband’s not on it). Notaro chronicles her chronic misfortune in the domestic arts, including cooking, cleaning, and putting on Spanx while sweaty (which should technically qualify as an Olympic sport). Housebroken is a rollicking new collection of essays showcasing her irreverent wit and inability to feel shame. From defying nature in the quest to make her own Twinkies, to begging her new neighbors not to become urban livestock keepers, to teaching her eight-year-old nephew about hoboes, Notaro recounts her best efforts—and hilarious failures—in keeping a household inches away from being condemned. After all, home wasn’t built in a day. Praise for Laurie Notaro “Notaro is a scream, the freak-magnet of a girlfriend you can’t wait to meet for a drink to hear her latest story.”—The Plain Dealer “Hilarious, fabulously improper, and completely relatable, Notaro is the queen of funny.”—Celia Rivenbark, author of Rude Bitches Make Me Tired “Notaro is direct and self-deprecating, and her disastrous attempts to sew a dress and make jerky treats for her dog are relatable and funny.”—Library Journal

How to Housebreak Your Dog in 7 Days (Revised)

How to Housebreak Your Dog in 7 Days (Revised)
Title How to Housebreak Your Dog in 7 Days (Revised) PDF eBook
Author Shirlee Kalstone
Publisher Bantam
Total Pages 96
Release 2009-11-04
Genre Pets
ISBN 0307573516

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For almost twenty years, dog owners have turned to this compact guide for sensible, step-by-step advice how to housebreak their beloved pets—in just one week! Now revised and updated, pet expert Shirlee Kalstone's foolproof method for housebreaking your dog is available with a fresh new look and up-to-date information. Whether your dog is a puppy or getting on in years, whether your goal is to housebreak, paper train, or litter train, this practical, easy-to-follow plan will help you transform your pet into a dependable member of the household—in a way that works with both his innate behavioral instincts and your individual lifestyle. You'll never again have to worry about your dog acting out, feeling anxious or depressed—or ruining your brand-new rug—as you discover: • The simple secret of successful housebreaking—understanding your dog as a den dweller • Step-by-step programs tailored to both apartment dwellers and home owners, as well as to people who go to work, versus those who are home all day • Schedules for training puppies and (re)training adult dogs • How to identify your dog's natural behavioral rhythms—and use them to your advantage • How to cope with housebreaking lapses, marking territory, separation anxiety, and health problems • The power of praise and positive reinforcement, not punishment Including sample schedules and timetables, and a list of related resources and websites, here is the essential, proven advice that will make training a pleasure, for both you and your dog.