As he grows up on his family's farm in New York, Almanzo Wilder dreams of having a colt of his own.

In an irreverent series in the tradition of Monty Python, the bestselling authors of the Iron Druid Chronicles and Star Wars: Phasma reinvent fantasy, fairy tales, and floridly written feast scenes. “Ranks among the best of Christopher Moore and Terry Pratchett.”—Chuck Wendig “When you put two authors of this high caliber together, expect fireworks. Or at least laughs. What a hoot!”—Terry Brooks Once upon a time, in a faraway kingdom, a hero, the Chosen One, was born . . . and so begins every fairy tale ever told. This is not that fairy tale. There is a Chosen One, but he is unlike any One who has ever been Chosened. And there is a faraway kingdom, but you have never been to a magical world quite like the land of Pell. There, a plucky farm boy will find more than he’s bargained for on his quest to awaken the sleeping princess in her cursed tower. First there’s the Dark Lord, who wishes for the boy’s untimely death . . . and also very fine cheese. Then there’s a bard without a song in her heart but with a very adorable and fuzzy tail, an assassin who fears not the night but is terrified of chickens, and a mighty fighter more frightened of her sword than of her chain-mail bikini. This journey will lead to sinister umlauts, a trash-talking goat, the Dread Necromancer Steve, and a strange and wondrous journey to the most peculiar “happily ever after” that ever once-upon-a-timed. Praise for Kill the Farm Boy “A rollicking fantasy adventure that upends numerous genre tropes in audacious style . . . a laugh-out-loud-funny fusion of Monty Python–esque humor and whimsy à la Terry Pratchett’s Discworld.”—Kirkus Reviews “Dawson and Hearne’s reimagining of a traditional fairy tale is reminiscent of William Goldman’s The Princess Bride and William Steig’s Shrek! Irreverent, funny, and full of entertaining wordplay, this will keep readers guessing until the end.”—Library Journal “Will have you laughing out loud until strangers begin to look at you oddly.”—SyFy “A smart comedy . . . nuanced, complicated, and human.”—Tordotcom “[Delilah Dawson and Kevin Hearne] make fun of the typical ‘white male power fantasies,’ and in that, they succeed, with their heroes all characters of color and/or falling somewhere under the LGBTQ umbrella.”—Publishers Weekly

High schooler Alex Johnson suddenly finds himself a muscle teen titan, thanks to a strange genetic treatment his late father gave him to save his life as an infant. As a shy, often awkward young man with Aspergers, can he adjust to now being likely the biggest, strongest man alive? Perhaps ever? Fortunately, Alex has a hot new boyfriend to stand by him as he tries to navigate quickly changing relationships with his friends. What Alex and Ryan donêt know is that their lives are about to take an ominous turn. Will Alex be able to take the bull by the horns?

For the first time in the history of the Little House books, this new edition features Garth Williams' interior art in vibrant, full color, as well as beautifully redesigned covers. While Laura Ingalls grows up in a little house on the western prairie, Almanzo Wilder is living on a big farm in New York State. Here Almanzo and his brother and sisters help with the summer planting and fall harvest. In winter there is wood to be chopped and great slabs of ice to be cut from the river and stored. Time for fun comes when the jolly tin peddler visits, or best of all, when the fair comes to town. This is Laura Ingalls Wilder's beloved story of how her husband Almanzo grew up as a farmer boy far from the little house where Laura lived.