Did you know human attacks account for a staggering 100 percent of premature deaths for witches, swamp monsters, cyborgs, and other supernatural, mutant, and exceptionally large beings? The past millennia or so has seen not only an uptick in human attacks, but also increasingly indiscriminate victim selection. It is understandable to feel overwhelmed. From renowned preternaturalist K. E. Flann, How to Survive a Human Attack provides critical information at a critical time with chapters specifically tailored to their target audience, including: · A Zombie’s Guide to Filling the Emptiness and Moving Forward · First-Time Haunter’s Guide for Ghosts, Spirits, Poltergeists, Specters, and Wraiths · Self-Training 101 for Werewolves: Sit, Don’t Speak, Stay Alive! · What’s Happening to My Body?: Radioactive Mutants and the Safety of the Nuclear Family

Move over zombies and adolescent vampires. There’s a new threat in town—and it’s only twelve inches tall. How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack is the only comprehensive survival guide that will help you prevent, prepare for, and ward off an imminent home invasion by the common garden gnome. Once thought of as harmless yard decorations, evidence is mounting that these smiling lawn statues are poised and ready to wreck havoc. The danger is real. And it’s here. Class 1 gnome-slayer and gnome defense expert Chuck Sambuchino has developed a proven system—Assess, Protect, Defend, Apply—for safeguarding property, possessions, and loved ones. Strategies include step-by-step instructions for gnome-proofing the average dwelling, recognizing and interpreting the signs of a gathering hoard, and—in the event that a secured perimeter is breached—confronting and combating the attackers at close range.

What causes bear attacks? When should you play dead and when should you fight an attacking bear? What do we know about black and grizzly bears and how can this knowledge be used to avoid bear attacks? And, more generally, what is the bear’s future? Bear Attacks is a thorough and unflinching landmark study of the attacks made on men and women by the great grizzly and the occasionally deadly black bear. This is a book for everyone who hikes, camps, or visits bear country–and for anyone who wants to know more about these sometimes fearsome but always fascinating wild creatures.

How To Survive A Stuffed Bear Attack introduces us to Max, a little stuffed bear who is convinced he's real. He's usually a good little bear, except when bribed with the promise of his very own Power Wheel. Then he is ready to share some pretty amazing things about stuffed bears: secret things. Like the fact that stuffed bears can attack at any time. In this colorful picture book targeted for children aged 4-8, Max shares the steps of a stuffed bear attack and the only way humans can survive them. But you can't let Mr. Perkins, head of the Secret Stuffed Bear Council, know that Max opened his big mouth. Otherwise, he could be in serious trouble, maybe even banished from the Secret stuffed Bear Council forever. So you can't tell anyone you heard these things from Max!

Think and act like a Navy SEAL, and you can survive anything. The world is a dangerous place. You can live scared-or be prepared.

After enduring a vicious bear attack in the Russian Far East's Kamchatka Peninsula, a French anthropologist undergoes a physical and spiritual transformation that forces her to confront the tenuous distinction between animal and human. In the Eye of the Wild begins with an account of the French anthropologist Nastassja Martin’s near fatal run-in with a Kamchatka bear in the mountains of Siberia. Martin’s professional interest is animism; she addresses philosophical questions about the relation of humankind to nature, and in her work she seeks to partake as fully as she can in the lives of the indigenous peoples she studies. Her violent encounter with the bear, however, brings her face-to-face with something entirely beyond her ken—the untamed, the nonhuman, the animal, the wild. In the course of that encounter something in the balance of her world shifts. A change takes place that she must somehow reckon with. Left severely mutilated, dazed with pain, Martin undergoes multiple operations in a provincial Russian hospital, while also being grilled by the secret police. Back in France, she finds herself back on the operating table, a source of new trauma. She realizes that the only thing for her to do is to return to Kamchatka. She must discover what it means to have become, as the Even people call it, medka, a person who is half human, half bear. In the Eye of the Wild is a fascinating, mind-altering book about terror, pain, endurance, and self-transformation, comparable in its intensity of perception and originality of style to J. A. Baker’s classic The Peregrine. Here Nastassja Martin takes us to the farthest limits of human being.