This book is for family and friends who know a loved one experiencing domestic violence and coercive control, and would like to know how to best support them. Family and friends have a unique opportunity to help and support survivors, who often choose to seek their support before calling police or engaging services. A positive first experience talking about the abuse can make the difference between safety, and increased isolation and entrapment for a loved one. Knowing what to say and what not to say can help family and friends play the role they want to play: a source of support and safety for their loved one.This book is to be used to assist you in supporting a loved one who is navigating domestic violence and coercive control. It is not meant to replace professional assistance, court orders or involvement of law enforcement where appropriate. Rather, this book is designed to provide you with information, language and suggestions about how to respond to a very challenging, harmful and potentially dangerous situation. The concept behind this guide came from a survivor and was developed with input from other survivors. It represents their ideas about what they wanted and needed to hear from their loved ones. The guide offers information about how to identify domestic violence. It explains how coercive control, even when there is no apparent violence, can be very harmful and dangerous. It offers specific concrete steps that family and friends can take to support a loved one who is being abused.

This book is for family and friends who know a loved one experiencing domestic violence and coercive control, and would like to know how to best support them. Family and friends have a unique opportunity to help and support survivors, who often choose to seek their support before calling police or engaging services. A positive first experience talking about the abuse can make the difference between safety, and increased isolation and entrapment for a loved one. Knowing what to say and what not to say can help family and friends play the role they want to play: a source of support and safety for their loved one.This book is to be used to assist you in supporting a loved one who is navigating domestic violence and coercive control. It is not meant to replace professional assistance, court orders or involvement of law enforcement where appropriate. Rather, this book is designed to provide you with information, language and suggestions about how to respond to a very challenging, harmful and potentially dangerous situation. The concept behind this guide came from a survivor and was developed with input from other survivors. It represents their ideas about what they wanted and needed to hear from their loved ones. The guide offers information about how to identify domestic violence. It explains how coercive control, even when there is no apparent violence, can be very harmful and dangerous. It offers specific concrete steps that family and friends can take to support a loved one who is being abused.

"F.R.I.E.N.D.S. for Life: 7 Keys to Supporting Loved Ones Experiencing Domestic Violence," is an easy-to-follow guide people can use to support loved ones entangled in abusive relationships. Using the word "friends" as an acronym, the author, Judge Patricia J. Titus, suggests simple straightforward strategies the reader can use as they express care and concern for their family member, friend, neighbor or coworker experiencing domestic violence.

Many books have been written for those who have been abused, but what about those who have been abusive? Abusive and controlling behaviors are sadly common in the U.S. and all over the world. There is plenty of support for people who need to get free of abuse, but very few books have been written for people who struggle with being abusive and controlling themselves. Becoming Allies fills that gap. This comprehensive book, the first of its kind, draws on the author’s three decades of experience in the field of intimate partner violence working with thousands of people who have been abusive. It presents for the first time the best practices of specialized abuse-prevention programs from around the country. Becoming Allies identifies and examines abusive and controlling behaviors, explains the underlying beliefs that drive them, and teaches specific, concrete techniques for changing them. It is nothing short of a lifeline for people who want to stop their abusive and controlling behaviors and improve their relationships with themselves, their partners, and their loved ones.

One of the most difficult and dangerous things a person can do is to leave an abusive relationship. This book provides insights into what victims go through and the challenges they face to change from "victims" to "survivors". It is filled with real-life stories and experinces as well as quotes from survivors who have made that change. It also provides information the author feels is important not only for the survivor but also for the family, friends and loved ones of those caught up in the frightening, crazy-making world of abusive relationships. The author addresses such issues as: What is domestic violence? Why do victims stay and/or return to the abuser? What are the psychological, emotional and verbal tools the abuser uses to control the victim? What is the worst part of the abuse according to victims? What is the Cycle of Abuse and how does it compare to the Cycle of Respect? Why is it so hard to get away? What is Safety Planning and how can friends, family and loved ones play a big part in it?

Seal Press originally published Helping Her Get Free with the title To Be an Anchor in the Storm. Almost ten years after its original publication, this groundbreaking and practical guide remains a wise, informed, and vital resource for those who want to assist a friend or loved one in her struggle to escape an abusive relationship. Susan Brewster, a longtime psychotherapist whose practice includes working with abused women and their families, recognizes that friends and family need specific tools and ideas to help them develop a relationship with their abused loved one that will ultimately benefit her, not control her. As the survivor of an abusive relationship herself, Brewster teaches readers how to recognize the signs of abuse, handle negative feelings, become an effective advocate, deal with the abuser, and more. With a new introduction and updated resource section, this straightforward and compassionate book is just as timely and important as ever, offering the information needed to give strength to women who are trying to break free.

There is life, joy, and love after abuse As a young wife and mother, Kelly White experienced violence and terror at the hands of her husband. She knows firsthand the love–hate relationships women often have with their abusers and the devastating effects these feelings can have on independence and self-confidence. She has sought refuge in a women’s shelter, worked to obtain help from law enforcement and struggled financially and emotionally as a single mother and sole breadwinner. Twenty-five years later, as the leader of nationally recognized programs for battered women, she has helped thousands of women and children rebuild their lives. White’s own story, and those of other women who have survived and thrived, are related here. She also provides practical tools for abused women and the friends, family and professionals who seek to help them. You learn to: recognize dangerous red flags and break through denial use the legal, law-enforcement and organizational resources available in your community overcome fear and stress to build a new life discover the ways in which you are more powerful, competent and capable than you thought White includes important information on the impact of domestic violence on children, the role of drugs and alcohol in abuse, violence against people with disabilities and battering in the lesbian/gay/bisexual/transgendered communities. While violence against women is not a thing of the past, using this resource can help battered women make it a part of their pasts — and create a safe and fulfilling future for themselves and their children.