Why do many good children treat one another so badly? This is a question parents eventually face and most start thinking about as their children prepare for high school. But the hard truth is, high school is too late. The pre-teen years are actually when it begins, when the cruelty is even worse, causing more anxiety and stress for children already facing an enormous amount of change in their lives. Early adolescence is a phase of anxiety, of uncertainty, of insecurity. To make matters worse, although all kids are going through the same transformation, none of them share what it is like, each feeling alone, isolated, and unique. The result is that even fantastic kids will do and say harmful things. Why Good Kids Act Cruel is the first book to give you an understanding of why cruelty happens during these years and how to help your child through these difficult times. She didn't make it; she was born with it: her nose. And in elementary school that was okay. But now in seventh grade, sometimes other girls would tease, "What's the matter Blaise, you having a bad nose day?" Looking in the mirror before school, she could see what they were making fun of. One day, a girl she had beaten out for a starting spot on the basketball team threw a nickname at her: "Snout." Some of the girl's friends picked it up, and it stuck. Blaise acted like she didn't care. But as she started to hate her nose, she started to hate herself.

Solve toddler challenges with eight key mindshifts that will help you parent with clarity, calmness, and self-control. In Why is My Child in Charge?, Claire Lerner shows how making critical mindshifts—seeing children’s behaviors through a new lens —empowers parents to solve their most vexing childrearing challenges. Using real life stories, Lerner unpacks the individualized process she guides parents through to settle common challenges, such as throwing tantrums in public, delaying bedtime for hours, refusing to participate in family mealtimes, and resisting potty training. Lerner then provides readers with a roadmap for how to recognize the root cause of their child’s behavior and how to create and implement an action plan tailored to the unique needs of each child and family. Why is My Child in Charge? is like having a child development specialist in your home. It shows how parents can develop proven, practical strategies that translate into adaptable, happy kids and calm, connected, in-control parents.

"She's 22 years old, for heaven's sake! We thought she'd be grown up by now. But no, it's one more crisis after another. And then she calls on us—for emotional support, problem-solving advice. Even money...although we've gotten pretty tough about that. It's like she's still a teen! Why is it so hard for her just to act like an adult?" Around age 18, most young people expect, and are expected to, move out and live on their own—either at college or in an apartment. But more and more often, "boomerang kids" are returning home defeated, leaving you frustrated and at a loss for how to help them. In this breakthrough book, Carl Pickhardt, author of Why Good Kids Act Cruel, exposes the hidden period of development that's causing increasing numbers of post-high school and college age kids to fail on their own and tells parents what you can do to fix it. His new approach to understanding young adulthood proposes that 18–to–23 year-olds have reached not adulthood, but a final stage of adolescence called "trial independence." Boomerang Kids helps parents understand this little-discussed period in your children's lives, so you can help them get through this last and most difficult stage of adolescence and get back out on their own, to become fully, and successfully, independent adults.

Who of us cannot remember the pain and humiliation of being rejected by our classmates? However thick-skinned or immune to such assaults we may become as adults, the memory of those early exclusions is as palpable to each of us today as it is common to human experience. We remember the uncertainty of separating from our home and entering school as strangers and, more than the relief of making friends, we recall the cruel moments of our own isolation as well as those children we knew were destined to remain strangers. In this book Vivian Paley employs a unique strategy to probe the moral dimensions of the classroom. She departs from her previous work by extending her analysis to children through the fifth grade, all the while weaving remarkable fairy tale into her narrative description. Paley introduces a new rule—“You can’t say you can’t play”—to her kindergarten classroom and solicits the opinions of older children regarding the fairness of such a rule. We hear from those who are rejected as well as those who do the rejecting. One child, objecting to the rule, says, “It will be fairer, but how are we going to have any fun?” Another child defends the principle of classroom bosses as a more benign way of excluding the unwanted. In a brilliant twist, Paley mixes fantasy and reality, and introduces a new voice into the debate: Magpie, a magical bird, who brings lonely people to a place where a full share of the sun is rightfully theirs. Myth and morality begin to proclaim the same message and the schoolhouse will be the crucible in which the new order is tried. A struggle ensues and even the Magpie stories cannot avoid the scrutiny of this merciless pack of social philosophers who will not be easily caught in a morality tale. You Can’t Say You Can’t Play speaks to some of our most deeply held beliefs. Is exclusivity part of human nature? Can we legislate fairness and still nurture creativity and individuality? Can children be freed from the habit of rejection? These are some of the questions. The answers are to be found in the words of Paley’s schoolchildren and in the wisdom of their teacher who respectfully listens to them.

In this clear and compassionate guide, an expert counselor offers help for parents dealing with the misbehavior of good kids. Here are step-by-step solutions for handling just about every explosive situation, plus advice on how parents can preserve their sanity.

Expert suggestions for guiding your child through the rough teenage years Does it sometimes seem like your teenager is trying to push you over the edge? Learn what your child is going through and what you can do to help your teen navigate this difficult period in this practical guide from psychologist and parenting expert Carl Pickhardt. In an easy-to-read style, Dr. Pickhardt describes a 4-stage model of adolescent growth to help parents anticipate common developmental changes in their daughter or son from late elementary school through the college age years. Provides unique advice for dealing with arguing, chores, the messy room, homework, and many other issues Offers best practices for teaching effective communication, constructive conflict, and responsible decision-making Includes ideas for protecting kids against the dangers of the Internet, bullying, dating, sexual involvement, and substance use An essential road map for parents looking to guide their children on the path to adulthood.

Expert guidance for parents on growing up their kids Psychologist Carl Pickhardt offers insight from his thirty years of experience counseling caregivers on how to navigate the adolescent development process—from eight to eighteen. For most parents, the onset of puberty brings an unexpected, even unwelcome change in their child’s behavior, which can cause bewilderment, confusion, and sadness. Dr. Pickhardt’s comforting and knowledgeable voice points out that not only can growth change many beloved characteristics of their child, but also it can alter dynamics in the relationship. Parents, teachers, and caretakers will find comfort with effective practices to help kids achieve responsible independence from the end of childhood through young adulthood and beyond.