How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? Tell her a joke on Wednesday! Celebrate the ditsiest and dumbest blondes of them all with The World’s Stupidest Blondes. From blonde celebrity bloopers to blonde jokes and blonde bombshells, this book provides you with all things goofy and golden. Whether you’re blonde or brunette, dumb or not so dumb, this book’s sure to entertain with pieces like: Hypothetically Blonde: Things that can keep a blonde pondering for days -Ask her for the definition of stir-fry -Give her a piece of paper with “please turn over” written on both sides -Send her to the grocery store for jumbo shrimp From the famous to the everyday, The World’s Stupidest Blondes gets to the root of blonde absurdity—bad dye job or not!

If you think Brazilian is a nationality, that PJ's are pyjamas and that Beyond is somewhere far away, then you have never met a Bergdorf Blonde. Plum Syke's heroine is British but has moved to America, working for a glossy magazine. She takes us with her into the glamorous world of Park Avenue Princesses who careen through New York in search of the ever elusive 'Fiance,' the perfect fake tan and that Chanel from the sample sale. In a fabulously witty style, Plum Sykes makes us root for her glorious heroine all the way from New York to the South of France and back by PJ (private jet.) She will get her Harry Winston and her Vera Wang wedding dress yet!

Demonstrates how society favors the beautiful and how better-looking people experience startling but undeniable benefits in various aspects of life. This title shows that the attractive are more likely to be employed, work more productively and profitably, negotiate loans with better terms, and have more handsome and highly educated spouses.

A pocket atlas of Surrey, giving comprehensive and detailed coverage of the region. The mapping is produced by the Ordnance Survey to Philip's specification and gives the user complete coverage of all urban and rural areas. The mapping is at a standard scale of 2.5 inches to one mile and is complete with postcode boundaries.

Mae West, Marlene Dietrich, Marilyn Monroe, and Madonna, just to name a few. Each of them, at times, naughty, controversial, propheticàand blonde. What is it about these golden-tressed bombshells that cause us to hang on their every word? YouÆll find out in On Being Blonde, which showcases the worldÆs top 40 blondes, sharing their outrageous life stories and their wise and witty bon mots. This is the most complete collection to date of the most quotable quotes by the fair haired chanteuses from our past and our present. From "Strawberry" to "Dishwater" weÆve got a dynamic sampling of the most profound statements to ever escape their lipsà and thatÆs no joke! Plus Blonde tips, tricks, and trivia. Everything you ever wanted to know about the Blonde mystique! "If I've one life...let me live it as a blonde!" --Clairol. "Gentlemen prefer blondes" --Anita Loos "I'm not offended by dumb blonde jokes because I know that I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde." --Dolly Parton

'As you'd expect from Holt, Blonde Bombshell is rife with puns, complicated setups for ridiculous gags, and a riveting story that is completely implausible.' - Booklist 'BLONDE BOMBSHELL is a clever, funny, tirelessly inventive, apocalyptic leg-hump of a book. Tom Holt may be the most imaginative satirist to land on our shores since Douglas Adams' - Christopher Moore A heart-warming tale of Armageddon from one of the funniest, most original voices in comic fiction today . . . The third planet out from the star was blue, with green splodges. Dirt. Oh, the bomb thought. And then its courage, determination and nobility-of-spirit subroutines cut in, overriding everything else, adrenalizing its command functions and bypassing its cyberphrenetic nodes. Here goes, said the bomb to itself. Calibrate navigational pod. Engage primary thrusters. Ready auxiliary drive. It knew, in that moment, that its own doom was near; because it was giving itself orders, and it wasn't putting in any 'the's. That was what you did, apparently, when the moment came. You could also turn on a flashing red beacon and a siren, but mercifully these were optional. Oh #/$+! thought the bomb, and surged on towards Dirt like an avenging angel. Perfect for fans of Douglas Adams, BLONDE BOMBSHELL is the science fiction debut from Tom Holt - one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction. Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who's Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World's End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling Sideways Little People Song for Nero Meadowland Barking Blonde Bombshell The Management Style of the Supreme Beings An Orc on the Wild Side

The Blondes is a hilarious and whipsmart novel where an epidemic of a rabies-like disease is carried only by blonde women, all of whom must go to great lengths to conceal their blondness. Hazel Hayes is a grad student living in New York City. As the novel opens, she learns she is pregnant (from an affair with her married professor) at an apocalyptically bad time: random but deadly attacks on passers-by, all by blonde women, are terrorizing New Yorkers. Soon it becomes clear that the attacks are symptoms of a strange illness that is transforming blondes—whether CEOs, flight attendants, students or accountants—into rabid killers. Emily Schultz's beautifully realized novel is a mix of satire, thriller, and serious literary work. With biting satiric wit, The Blondes is at once an examination of the complex relationships between women, and a merciless but giddily enjoyable portrait of what happens in a world where beauty is—literally—deadly.