From the author of Toxic Friends-a groundbreaking look at how to understand your marriage and create a more satisfying relationship Every marriage goes through nine phases. It is only by understanding the course our marriages run that we can truly begin to craft the perfect relationship. In The Nine Phases of Marriage, Susan Shapiro Barash breaks down and analyzes these phases, which are: - Phase One: Passion and Longing - Phase Two: Conforming: The Perfect Wife - Phase Three: Real Life: Child Centricity - Phase Four: Tension: One Bed: Two Dreams - Phase Five: Distance: Two Beds: Two Rooms - Phase Six: Fracturing: Midlife Divorce - Phase Seven: Second Chances: Remarriage and Renegotiating - Phase Eight: Balance: Concessions - Phase Nine: Successful Coupling With this essential knowledge, spouses can successfully navigate the natural pitfalls and perils of their marriages and embark on a true partnership.

From the author of "Toxic Friends"--a groundbreaking look at how to understand marriage and create a more satisfying relationship.

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Over a million copies sold! “An eminently practical guide to an emotionally intelligent—and long-lasting—marriage.”—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has revolutionized the way we understand, repair, and strengthen marriages. John Gottman’s unprecedented study of couples over a period of years has allowed him to observe the habits that can make—and break—a marriage. Here is the culmination of that work: the seven principles that guide couples on a path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward yet profound, these principles teach partners new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy. Gottman offers strategies and resources to help couples collaborate more effectively to resolve any problem, whether dealing with issues related to sex, money, religion, work, family, or anything else. Packed with new exercises and the latest research out of the esteemed Gottman Institute, this revised edition of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.

When it first appeared in 1995, The Good Marriage became a best-seller. It offers timeless clues to the secret of happy, long-lasting marriages. Based on a groundbreaking study of fifty couples who consider themselves happily married, psychologist Judith Wallerstein presents the four basic types of marriage — romantic, rescue, companionate, and traditional — and identifies nine developmental tasks that must be successfully undertaken in a “good marriage” — separation from the family of origin, up-and-down vicissitudes of early years, children, balance of work and home, dealing with infidelities, and more. The men and women Wallerstein interviewed readily admit that even the best relationship requires hard work and continuing negotiation, especially in the midst of societal pressures that can tear marriages apart. But they also convey an inspirational message, for almost all of them feel that their marriage is their single greatest accomplishment. The Good Marriage explains why, and its lively mix of storytelling and analysis will challenge every couple to think in a profoundly different way about the most important relationship in their lives. “Should be required reading for all who are interested in marriage.” — W. Walter Menninger “Should prove a lifesaver for many couples.” — Publishers Weekly “Will enrich the sparse literature on happy marriages.” — USA Today “One of the nice things about The Good Marriage is its modesty. It doesn’t pretend to offer a philosophy or even a lecture on marriage. It takes no position on the ideologically charged issues of women’s marital roles and status. Equally important, it ignores the two most common ways of talking about marriage — as a contract negotiated between two equal parties and as the pathway to individual fulfillment. For this reason it is refreshingly free of ‘rights’ talk and therapy talk. Indeed, Wallerstein places much more emphasis on the development of good judgment and a moral sense than on the acquisition of effective communication or negotiation skills.” — Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, The Atlantic “A lagniappe to enduring couplehood... The strength of this study is that Ms. Wallerstein, a gifted interviewer, persuades the couples to reveal their interior lives in rich, explicit detail.” — Susan Jacoby, The New York Times Book Review “Written in a masterful style that often reads like the best popular fiction... Wallerstein and Blakeslee again combine their substantial talents... deftly and entertainingly exploring the foundations of good marriages.” — Tara Aronson, San Francisco Examiner & Chronicle “Groundbreaking.” — Boston Globe “This is a wonderfully readable and immensely valuable book, full of wise and original insights about the many, many roads to marital happiness.” — Judith Viorst “With wisdom, humor, and sympathetic understanding, Judith Wallerstein helps us recognize and rediscover the good marriage... lucid, psychologically sophisticated, and generously wise.” — David Blankenhorn, Newsday “Historically informative as well as profoundly wise psychologically.” — Joan M. Erikson “For a long time, as a Rabbi, I’ve been using The Good Marriage, by the late Judith Wallerstein... in my pre-marital counseling. She provides... amazingly helpful insights [which] open up conversations and lead couples to think much more deeply about what they are getting themselves into — and what they might need to do to keep their marriages strong.” — Rabbi Carl M. Perkins “A welcome addition to the field of literature on contemporary marriage... The style [is] clear, concise, sensitive and, occasionally, personal. Her personal additions... add warmth, emotional consciousness, and greater insight into what makes individuals and couples happy in their relationships. This book has value for the many audiences interested in relational theory that want to approach relationships from a realistic and positive perspective.” — Nancy Williford, Clinical Social Work Journal “In The Good Marriage, Wallerstein’s new study of 50 married couples offers affirmation that the process of marriage itself presents a vehicle for transformation... A best-selling author, Wallerstein employs a thoughtful, nonaggressive style that appeals to the general public. Wallerstein has performed an invaluable service in The Good Marriage.” — Elizabeth M. Tully, M.D., Journal of Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry “Solid... impressive... Those interested in social policy should be pleased that so well-respected a liberal academic as Ms. Wallerstein has written a book that celebrates marriage and points the way toward restructuring it.” — Wall Street Journal “With extraordinary skill and compassion Wallerstein and Blakeslee take us inside the lives of fifty American couples and find that a good marriage still provides the best framework for enduring love and intimacy.” — Sylvia Ann Hewlett “A very appealing book... clearly written and clearly thought out.” — Library Journal “Wallerstein’s major contribution is not about how and why love lasts, but about how and why love develops. It is in such a context, less idyllic, but more realistic, that the book will prove to be a lasting contribution.” — Readings: A Journal of Reviews and Commentary in Mental Health

Just as Masters and Johnson were pioneers in the study of human sexuality, so Dr. John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage. As a professor of psychology at the University of Washington and the founder and director of the Seattle Marital and Family Institute, he has studied the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over the course of many years. His findings, and his heavily attended workshops, have already turned around thousands of faltering marriages. This book is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward in their approach, yet profound in their effect, these principles teach partners new and startling strategies for making their marriage work. Gottman helps couples focus on each other, on paying attention to the small day-to-day moments that, strung together, make up the heart and soul of any relationship. Being thoughtful about ordinary matters provides spouses with a solid foundation for resolving conflict when it does occur and finding strategies for living with those issues that cannot be resolved. Packed with questionnaires and exercises whose effectiveness has been proven in Dr. Gottman's workshops, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the result of Dr. John Gottman's many years of closely observing thousands of marriages. This kind of longitudinal research has never been done before. Based on his findings, he has culled seven principles essential to the success of any marriage. Maintain a love map. Foster fondness and admiration. Turn toward instead of away. Accept influence. Solve solvable conflicts. Cope with conflicts you can't resolve. Create shared meaning. Dr. Gottman's unique questionnaires and exercises will guide couples on the road to revitalizing their marriage, or making a strong one even better.

Successful marriages are not an accident. A lasting marital relationship is the result of loving commitment, self-giving, intimacy, and respect for another person. It is a relationship in which a man and a woman grow together not only in body, but also in spirit. Grow Old Along with Me looks at the many elements that make a marriage more loving and fulfilling as two people grow older. In a mature relationship, spouses recognize and appreciate the good in their marriage, not only in the past, but right here and now. A mature couple is in a unique position to eliminate frustrations as they are drawn ever closer. Intimacy finds a new dimension -- a dimension that moves beyond the physical encounter. This new intimacy binds the couple in a deeper union as they move away from things that disrupt their relationship to become joined in spirit as well as body. Couples growing together in mature intimacy find it easier to adapt to change and to stay interested in each other and in their world. Complete with spousal discussion starters and sections relating to adult children and remarriage after the death of a spouse, Grow Old Along with Me is a celebration of the joys of marriage in the mature years. Book jacket.

A step-by-step approach to making your marriage loving again.