When aliens abduct both Leo and his artist friend Tim, Leo tries to determine why these creatures from outer space want particularly to use his friend's talent.

Leo and Tim are abducted by aliens—and find themselves in the middle of an intergalactic feud Leo is driving his best friend, Tim, to the station to catch the midnight train to New York City, where Tim hopes to sell his science fiction drawings to a publisher. But they never get there. While on the road, Leo and Tim see a strange circle of lights in the sky, and before they know it, creepy, tiny-headed creatures are taking samples of the boys’ blood on some sort of spaceship. Suddenly, Leo is back in his car and Tim—along with Leo’s memory—is gone. Worse, when Leo finally starts to remember what happened, no one believes him. Before long, the 2 friends find themselves in the middle of a cosmic contest between warring alien races—and the people of Earth are caught in the crossfire. Time is running out, and it’s up to Leo and Tim to save the planet from catastrophe.

In the tradition of Kitchen Confidential and Waiter Rant, a rollicking, eye-opening, fantastically indiscreet memoir of a life spent (and misspent) in the hotel industry. “Highly amusing."—New York Times Jacob Tomsky never intended to go into the hotel business. As a new college graduate, armed only with a philosophy degree and a singular lack of career direction, he became a valet parker for a large luxury hotel in New Orleans. Yet, rising fast through the ranks, he ended up working in “hospitality” for more than a decade, doing everything from supervising the housekeeping department to manning the front desk at an upscale Manhattan hotel. He’s checked you in, checked you out, separated your white panties from the white bed sheets, parked your car, tasted your room-service meals, cleaned your toilet, denied you a late checkout, given you a wake-up call, eaten M&Ms out of your minibar, laughed at your jokes, and taken your money. In Heads in Beds he pulls back the curtain to expose the crazy and compelling reality of a multi-billion-dollar industry we think we know. Heads in Beds is a funny, authentic, and irreverent chronicle of the highs and lows of hotel life, told by a keenly observant insider who’s seen it all. Prepare to be amused, shocked, and amazed as he spills the unwritten code of the bellhops, the antics that go on in the valet parking garage, the housekeeping department’s dirty little secrets—not to mention the shameless activities of the guests, who are rarely on their best behavior. Prepare to be moved, too, by his candor about what it’s like to toil in a highly demanding service industry at the luxury level, where people expect to get what they pay for (and often a whole lot more). Employees are poorly paid and frequently abused by coworkers and guests alike, and maintaining a semblance of sanity is a daily challenge. Along his journey Tomsky also reveals the secrets of the industry, offering easy ways to get what you need from your hotel without any hassle. This book (and a timely proffered twenty-dollar bill) will help you score late checkouts and upgrades, get free stuff galore, and make that pay-per-view charge magically disappear. Thanks to him you’ll know how to get the very best service from any business that makes its money from putting heads in beds. Or, at the very least, you will keep the bellmen from taking your luggage into the camera-free back office and bashing it against the wall repeatedly.