A latest collection of quotes features entries that are thematically arranged to provide narrative readings, in a volume that celebrates the lighter side of such topics as courtship, lawyers, and aging.

An irreverent selection of humorous quotes, one-liners, definitions, and quips features words of wisdom from contributors ranging from Goethe to David Letterman on such topics as families, philosophy, movies and television, and education.

Presenting the best of the best from AllGreatQuotes.com, this uproarious volume features gems on every topic, from sex and money to spouses and politics. From the witty quips of Mark Twain to the unintentionally hilarious gaffs of today’s celebrities, this collection of snappy quotes puts readers in hysterics. This uproarious volume has clever gems on every topic imaginable. It ranges from Oscar Wilde’s devious perspective on people (“Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them so much.”) to Socrates’ ironic advice on marriage (“By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll be happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”) to Julia Roberts’ view on keeping it real (“Your face tells a story—and it shouldn’t be a story about your drive to the doctor’s office.”). The 2,320 FunniestQuotes is perfect for readers who want a cocktail party wisecrack, Facebook wall post, or witty retort, or who are just looking for a reason to smile. Laugh until you cry with such words of wisdom as . . . God gave man a penis and a brain, but not enough blood to use both at the same time. —Robin Williams Money can’t buy you happiness, but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery. —Spike Milligan Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. —Oscar Wilde The answers to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle, they’re on TV! —Homer Simpson When I eventually met Mr. Right, I had no idea that his first name was “Always.” —Rita Rudner Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. —George Burns

"This collection contains some real gems!" UNITED PRESS INTERNATIONAL From Golda Meir to Erma Bombeck...from Aldous Huxley to Abbie Hoffman...from Oscar Wilde to W.C. Fields...from Queen Victoria to Mae West...from Aristotle to Idi Amin....here are the 637 best things anybody ever said--on God, Life, Death, Murder, Stupidity, Narcisism, Birth, Youth, Sex, Love, Marriage, Horses, Greeks, Romans, Politics, Literature, Drink, Presidents, and a great deal more.

For most of us, that perfect retort or witty reply often escapes us when we need it most, only to come to mind with perfect clarity when it's too late to be useful. The twentieth-century writer Heywood Broun described this all-too-common phenomenon when he wrote "Repartee is what we wish we'd said." In Viva la Repartee, Dr. Mardy Grothe, author of Oxymoronica, has lovingly assembled a collection of masterfully composed -- and perfectly timed -- replies that have turned the tables on opponents and adversaries. This delightful volume is a celebration of the most impressive retorts, ripostes, rejoinders, comebacks, quips, ad-libs, bon mots, off-the-cuff comments, wisecracks, and other clever remarks ever to come out of the mouths -- and from the pens -- of people throughout history. Touching on all areas of human endeavor, including politics, the arts, literature, sports, relationships, and even the risqué, the book features contributions from Oscar Wilde, Mark Twain, Dorothy Parker, Mae West, Groucho Marx, Winston Churchill, Dolly Parton, and scores more. As entertaining as it is intellectually enriching, Viva la Repartee is sure to capture the attention of language lovers and is the perfect antidote for anyone who's ever thought I wish I'd said that!

"David Orr is no starry-eyed cheerleader for contemporary poetry; Orr’s a critic, and a good one. . . . Beautiful & Pointless is a clear-eyed, opinionated, and idiosyncratic guide to a vibrant but endangered art form, essential reading for anyone who loves poetry, and also for those of us who mostly just admire it from afar." —Tom Perrotta Award-winning New York Times Book Review poetry columnist David Orr delivers an engaging, amusing, and stimulating tour through the world of poetry. With echoes of Francine Prose’s Reading Like a Writer, Orr’s Beautiful & Pointless offers a smart and funny approach to appreciating an art form that many find difficult to embrace.

You don't have to be a genius to sound like one. Here's a collection of the most profound and provocative wit and wisdom in the English language in two lines or less. Edited by entrepreneur John M. Shanahan, who created the wildly successful Hooked on Phonics program, this wonderful book presents the best that has been thought and said on every imaginable topic. Classified by such themes as "Truth, Lies, and Deception," "Men, Women, and Relationships," and "Passions, Virtues, and Vices," these quotes contain timeless messages for all humankind. Oscar Wilde: "A man who marries his mistress leaves a vacancy in that position." Charles de Gaulle: "The cemetery is filled with indispensable men." Abraham Lincoln: "Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." Sophocles: "Men of ill judgment oft ignore the good that lies within their hands, till they have lost it." Perfect for anyone who has ever been left speechless, this book will make you as glib as Oscar Wilde, as profound as Winston Churchill, and as wise as Aesop. Inspirational, entertaining, and thought-provoking, this is one collection that no library or bookshelf should be without.