A passionate and profane love letter to fall, the best fucking season of the year. Do you get excited at the first brisk breeze of the year? Are you overcome with delight when you see piles of red leaves? Do you lose your fucking mind at a pumpkin patch? At last, the epically funny internet sensation It's Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers is now a visual tour-de-force, teeming with a cornucopia of perfectly paired photos and seasonal enchantments to make it really fucking sing. Whiffy candles, wicker baskets, motherfucking gourd after gourd, and people going insane they love fall so much? Check! Also included: the equally lifechanging meditation It's Rotting Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers, because all good things must end. Give it to everyone you love, or put it on your fucking coffee table next to a pile of shellacked vegetables to really tie the room together. Perfect for: For anyone who fucking loves fall, and fans of McSweeney's, Go the Fuck to Sleep, Deep Thoughts, the Onion, and the New Yorker.

Featuring way too many forewords, including one by Jake Tapper It's a great undertaking to raise a humor website from infancy to full-fledged adulthood, but with the right editors, impeccable taste, and a dire political landscape, your site will enjoy years of relevance and comic validation. Join us as we revisit the first twenty-one years of McSweeney's Internet Tendency, from our bright-eyed and bewildered early stages to our world-weary and bewildered recent days. Keep Scrolling Till You Feel Something is a coming-of-age celebration of the pioneering website, featuring brand-new pieces and classics by some of today's best humor writers, like Ellie Kemper, Wendy Molyneux, Jesse Eisenberg, Tim Carvell, Karen Chee, Colin Nissan, Megan Amram, John Moe, and many more. Including: I Don't Hate Women Candidates--I Just Hated Hillary and Coincidentally I'm Starting to Hate Elizabeth Warren It's Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers On the Implausibility of the Death Star's Trash Compactor The Only Thing That Can Stop This Asteroid is Your Liberal Arts Degree If Women Wrote Men the Way Men Write Women My Coming Out Story, Sponsored by Bank of America I Regret to Inform You That My Wedding to Captain Von Trapp Has Been Canceled Please Forgive Us at Blue Apron for This Week's Meals. We've Been Having a Tough Time Lately

A collection of top-selected writings from the iconic Internet article site known for its humorous articles, unwavering Garamond font and abnormally narrow margins includes such entries as "I Regret to Inform You That My Wedding to Captain Von Trapp Has Been Canceled" and "Hamlet (Facebook News Feed Edition.)" 20,000 first printing.

Are you a witless cretin with no reason to live? Would you like to know more about every piece of knowledge ever? Do you have cash? Then congratulations, because just in time for the death of the print industry as we know it comes the final book ever published, and the only one you will ever need: The Onion's compendium of all things known. Replete with an astonishing assemblage of facts, illustrations, maps, charts, threats, blood, and additional fees to edify even the most simple-minded book-buyer, The Onion Book of Known Knowledge is packed with valuable information -- such as the life stages of an Aunt; places to kill one's self in Utica, New York; and the dimensions of a female bucket, or "pail." With hundreds of entries for all 27 letters of the alphabet, The Onion Book of Known Knowledge must be purchased immediately to avoid the sting of eternal ignorance.

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • The social media star, New York Times columnist, and author of Dining In helps you nail dinner with unfussy food and the permission to be imperfect. “Enemy of the mild, champion of the bold, Ms. Roman offers recipes in Nothing Fancy that are crunchy, cheesy, tangy, citrusy, fishy, smoky and spicy.”—Julia Moskin, The New York Times IACP AWARD FINALIST • NAMED ONE OF THE BEST COOKBOOKS OF THE YEAR BY The New York Times Book Review • The New Yorker • NPR • The Washington Post • San Francisco Chronicle • BuzzFeed • The Guardian • Food Network An unexpected weeknight meal with a neighbor or a weekend dinner party with fifteen of your closest friends—either way and everywhere in between, having people over is supposed to be fun, not stressful. This abundant collection of all-new recipes—heavy on the easy-to-execute vegetables and versatile grains, paying lots of close attention to crunchy, salty snacks, and with love for all the meats—is for gatherings big and small, any day of the week. Alison Roman will give you the food your people want (think DIY martini bar, platters of tomatoes, pots of coconut-braised chicken and chickpeas, pans of lemony turmeric tea cake) plus the tips, sass, and confidence to pull it all off. With Nothing Fancy, any night of the week is worth celebrating. Praise for Nothing Fancy “[Nothing Fancy] is full of the sort of recipes that sound so good, one contemplates switching off any and all phones, calling in sick, and cooking through the bulk of them.”—Food52 “[Nothing Fancy] exemplifies that classic Roman approach to cooking: well-known ingredients rearranged in interesting and compelling ways for young home cooks who want food that looks (and photographs) as good as it tastes.”—Grub Street

Julie Jackson is back and more subversive than ever! This new anniversary edition of her classicSubversive Cross Stitchcelebrates more than 10 years of delightfully snarky, in-your-face cross stitch with 50 full-color patterns including17 brand-new designs, such as "Don't Be Such A Baby" and "Cheer Up, Loser." Subversive Cross Stitch: 50 F*cking Clever Designs For Your Sassy Sideinvites stitchers of all levels to fully express their bad-ass crafty selves, whether they need to release their inner curmudgeon or let fly with a witty insult. With alphabet charts and easy-to-follow instructions for every design,Subversive Cross Stitch: 50 F*cking Clever Designs For Your Sassy Sideincludes everything you need to get your craft on from the original instigator of subversive stitching.